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Author Topic: cerveza habla, la gente murmuran: The life and times of sasquatch going to cali  (Read 1005 times)

big rick

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Hello friends
as always, when i take a trip, i do these posts that i never seem to finish.
but since i'm going to an area where i can actually get service and have
access to a computer, i'll actually be able to post things.
and now that i also decide that it's good for me to sync my photos to the
googles in some crazy precipitation vessel, i can link images to this here
forum kajigger with ease.

Especially since i decided that on top of my tool box was a better place
to store my phone as opposed to my pocket.... which, if you drive away
from the location that you're in, you will lose your phone.... FACK

So with that being said, when i get  anew phone, i'll be taking lots of
pictures and backing them up for shizzle

So i'm heading up to Petaluma, California for a few days where i will drink
copious amounts of cannabis, smoke lots of beer, hang out with some
new friends, meet up with some old, and give my coworkers at Lagunitas
a reason to ship me out to California as fast as possible so they can officially
poke a sasquatch and have nothing to worry about.

ain't no jack links beef jerky anger goin on here.
only the lagu love.

anyway, i'm going to head home and figure out what i can do to get myself
a new phone before i leave or else i'm going to just have to point and shoot
crazy with a camera i haven't used in a few years.

So, my friends, be good, drink good beer, keep your debaucherous mayhem organized

big rick

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so i'm leaving today at 5pm
i'm going to be bringing all florida beers that they can't get out there
like a 2013 & 2014 hunahpu, i believe two other cigar city beers, and
possibly two corked beers from saint somewhere & redlight redlight

a lot of delicious beer for the road

the escape from reality is needed right now
not that getting drunk or smoking lots of pot is going to be my focus
i'm just going to go for a nice drive tomorrow and sunday to clear my
mind and just appreciate the surroundings as much as i can.

and in the process, i hope that some of my California friends can join up.

big rick

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Another hour then I leave

Super stoked

big rick

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So I have a lot to write and not much
time today but I will say this, a taste
of honey is worse than none at all


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Was there a reason you locked the topic? Hope you had fun in Cali


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we've seen the reason
and it is us

big rick

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i always lock the travel topics
i've been peppers crazy since i came back
i'll be writing and doing all sorts of updates to my images
on sunday.... hopefully i'll be posting crazy next week

peppers = fucking hell -or- the burn of work or anything else

big rick

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So apologies for the delay in postings
Once I landed here in Orlando, I woke up as fast as I went to sleep and really
haven’t stopped until just recently due to work slowing down a lil bit… and the
fact that I can literally sit here and kind of do nothing and also make moneys
is cool but only a smidge… I would much rather be working on internal marketing
projects around the building, external marketing projects to build client relations,
and elevations across the board for all of the architects here. So it’s good but that
I have some down time but not cause I like to stay busy.

Anyway, since I have been back, I have been able to, at least, go and edit the
images little by little and take the haze of the camera kind of out of the pictures.
Surprisingly enough, backup everything to the googles and the file size of all of
the images that I selected and downloaded to edit is 420mb. The exact number
that is rather synonymous with our brewery. ;) Unfortunately, there is not enough
space and or time in my traveling life to take the high end digital SLR with me and
just shoot like I want to. What does everyone tend to say when they come back
from vacation? ‘I need a vacation from my vacation’ or some bullshit like that? I
prefer to just say. I need a day of surfing to bring me back to normal. Something
I have yet to do since my arrival.

My last posting was that of one sasquatch leaving the airport and that I did.
I got on my flight, maybe a little more intoxicated than the next person, and peaced
out for the next six hours since I was tired from working 8am – 10pm ~ midnight for
about three weeks straight. When I awoke I was about to land in the land of technological
progression; San Francisco. I landed around 9:45pm PST, and when I did, I it was a
nice and crisp 40° in the bay area. Here I am, a 6’4” 355 pound man with a heavy
beard, nice deer skin shoes, beige linen pants, a thin button up white t-shirt, and a
straw looking full brimmed hat, that is stiff and looks flexible but isn’t, that I purchased
at the Bacardi factory last year, and I’m showing up into an area that is 40° and, to
say the least, people looked at me like I was fuckin nuts and not sure what the hell
was wrong with me. But I see myself as an ambassador of the state that I am from
and traveling to a place that is foreign to me, I want to look presentable.

I got myself my luggage, got my rental car, sent a few text messages to my friend
that I went to school with that now lives out there, and met him up at a place called
yuppy bar. I’m in San Fran… a place called yuppy bar sounds like it is not going to
be proper for a person like me but I feel as if I am dressed for the occasion since it’s
within the bay area and shit just cost money crazy out there. So I look up yuppy bar
in the googles maps, I get on my way, I arrive, park, and end up meeting my friend
in the intersection as I called him and to my surprise, I had parked two spaces ahead
of him on the street.

He and I walk up to yuppy bar, and as we arrive and open the first door to get in,
bliss in the form of music. Sometimes the best type of music when you’re walking
into a place called yuppy bar; punk music. The Sex Pistols – God Save the Queen,
to be exact. YES! I had a feeling I was going to LOVE this place. Pool tables, punk
music, cool peeps, bar tenders that invite the patrons to come outside to enjoy a
toke in the middle of their shifts, AND fresh Lagunitas beer on tap. So I converse
with my friend Matt Ma, a very smart and extremely friendly Asian gentlemen that
I had a few classes with along the collegiate way to minor success and jadedness
of sporadic parts of the real world. We talked about the area, he had a lot of local
knowledge of everything from the median income to the amount of moneys that a
startup makes from venture capitalist, roughly about $25m, for the purchase of the
possible next big mobile application, trend, or whatever in the area. Fascinating to
say the least. We shared laughs and as the current ambassador of the area, he was
extremely gracious and purchased my two beers that I ordered before I made my
way to Petaluma on my pilgrimage to the promise land.

I gave him a hug, we parted ways, and I hopped in the mid-sized car, a Chevy Malibu,
that I feel as if I paid way too much money for, and made my way through the dark
trenches of the hilly and somewhat mountainous area known as San Francisco from
San Mateo, where yuppy bar resides.

In the vehicular voyage, I had the opportunity to drive over the golden gate bridge
and take the short trek across it. Mind you, I say short cause I thought that, for some
reason, I would be on it for a solid ten minutes, but it was quick. Pictures do it justice
but don’t at the same time. Never having done any research on said bridge, I just figured,
from the images I’ve seen online from my friends, that it was way longer. However,
when I drove through it, that mother fucker was MASSIVE! I drove through slow being
that it was about 12:15am and there was no one on the roadways but my pictures aren’t
the best since I was trying to look up, avoid the construction, take pictures, drive straight,
and just take it all in.

BREATH TAKING to say the very least. I’m sure some of you have seen it in person and
experienced walking across it on both sides. I unfortunately was unable to do so but I’ll
explain more about that later.

I get to Petaluma around 1:30am, get my room, and go to bed with nothing but thoughts
of an alcoholic version of Willy Wonka where I will see a fat kid drinking from a river of
beer, girls that eat random candies and instead of blowing up into a plump Veruca Salt,
they turn into a laxed version of themselves that eventually find me extremely attractive
and rather entertaining… good enough to, at the time being, take me home later but allow
me to perform coitous for twenty minutes before returning to a debaucherous time, and
people that drink the Kool-ade and burp themselves into a fan that is pointed sideways
and blows hard enough to actually hold them up rather than potentially chop their heads
off – a dream of Lagunitas Brewery.

Surprisingly enough, it was exactly what I thought my dream would be, but I’ll get into
that later.
« Last Edit: December 24, 2015, 02:01:49 PM by big rick »


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more pics!

big rick

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They are on their way ;)

big rick

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So I get up nice and early, 6am to be exact, and I really don’t know what the fuck to do
with myself. I know no one, I know nothing of the area, I’m a lost puppy in a new field
of randomness that if I cared enough to look into at the very time, I would totally over
achiever mom and dad going to Disney with their three kids, cause Minnesota kind of
sucks, status. But since I’m running on nothing sleep, I digress and just figure I’ll wing it.

So I wake up, it’s a hot and steamy 36° outside and here I come walking through the
shadows of the Qi (us cool kids call the quality inn Qi for short cause we’re fuckin cool
like that) with board shorts, flip flops, a Lagunitas shirt, and a hoodie garnished with an
Orlando City Soccer Club scarf. I waltz into the lobby of Qi and everyone looks at me like
I’m growing a set of legs from my cheeks. I’m just being a goof and giving them the nod,
getting my free breakfast that wasn’t so bad, and eat outside. But, even though it’s cold,
it’s not 36° in Florida cold. It’s nuts how much humidity makes a HUGE difference in the
way the air feels outside.

I get done with that, have myself a walk back to the room, gather a few of my belongings
that I want to take on the road with me and drive down the street.

So, by now, I know where the brewery is; however, at the same time, I don’t. I just know
it is down the street and that’s about it. So I end up driving down the street, I don’t see
the brewery. Partially cause I’m in a car that I can’t see shit out of because I’m fucking
smooshed into a car that I really don’t fit in, I have to lean back super far to be able to
see out of the window properly, and the Crisco that helped me get into the car is REALLY
getting all over the windows (#DadJoke). I decide to pull over after not seeing shit for
the third time and look at my phone. I got what the exterior looked like inside my head
and I did a short drive down the road and as I arrive, the blissfulness of spent grains
perfumed the local air, a giant semi-truck awaits my arrival, and some dude that looks at
me and thinks, who the hell is this ugly monster that is coming through? What made it
awkward was that I had my phone out and I was recording while I was kind of pulling up
and the dude that was driving said truck was outside of it securing the back door of the
cargo area and he comes walking around the corner of the back of the semi and I just
felt weird.

Here is the video…

I get deeper into the dwelling of the Lagunitas fortress at 9am, I walk around a little bit
and, obviously, no one knows who I am. It’s a perfect scenario for me because I am that
person that knows everyone. I have people that I know peppered in all across the united
states, even Alaska and Hawai’i. A blessing and a curse at the same time. You think you
have gotten away from everyone that you know while on vacation and all of a sudden,
“hey, you’re Big Rick” and it’s someone you haven’t talked to in seven years. Cool when
you are looking forward to seeing someone, cool if you don’t mind randomly running into
someone you haven’t seen in so long, not so cool if you are literally trying to get away from
that exact thing. It happened in Puerto Rico, of all places, and it was weird but I was kind
of accepting of it since it was an ex fling that I still had feelings for kinda sorta... Anyway,
I walk around and take some pictures, I walk into one of the offices, they are looking at me
like I’m fuckin gonna gorilla smash everything, then I tell one person, who just so happened
to live in Orlando previous to living in California, who I am and they know who I am… Having
not met this person before this fine Friday morning, I am of somewhat concern; however,
since I did kind of announce that I was coming through, and hoping that she stalked me on
facebook or something and wanted to totally have me make sweet sweet love to her, I was
kind of expecting that I would run into someone that knew who I was. Well, it was the young
lady that I spoke on the phone with and had emailed prior to my trip, so it made a lot more
sense to me and clearly killed my fantasy of getting laid by beautiful women at random.

So I introduce myself to some of the staff then proceed to the merch room where we make
a LOT of moneys yearly in merch alone… actually, in that one room alone. We have everything
from bottle openers to beers to go to shirts, dog bowls, spent grain dog treats (which are delicious)
and anything else you could possibly want to purchase at a brewery. That’s cool and all but lets talk
about the scene and what it is like there….

this is a douche move on my end but I’m going to say it, let me quote myself… but before I do,
why…. Because I can and I think it was a pretty solid way to land a girlfriend that is into craft beer
but it also describes the brewery… when I was talking to my, now, girlfriend, I asked her, “are you
from a place that always smells like spent grains and it rains Belgian beer? I think it's called heaven
or something like that” The Lagunitas Brewery in Petaluma , California is exactly that, heaven.

If there is a god, she created Tony McGee, she put the thought process in his head to play reggae
music, move out to California, start a printing business, and fail only to purchase craft beers that
were way out of his price range only to then have his brother see this and purchase him a brewing
kit that turned into the catalyst that put heaven on earth.

Onward with my story.

So I’m so overwhelmed by the amazingness of the brewery on all senses…. Smell, touch, taste
(of the beers at 10am), sight and even sound, all overwhelmed by arriving at the brewery. I
couldn’t get over the fact that I was at the promise land but operations were not really happening
aside from brewing beer and selling some merch this early in the day so I left… I hopped into my
tiny ride, jetted up north a good fifteen minutes on the 101, and decided to take myself up to Bear
Republic Brewing Company where I arrived at 1059 am, a minute before they opened the brewery,
and I was let in without question.

I sit down at the bar, my bar tender was a gent by the name of Ryan who had been with the brewery
for 20+ years working behind that same bar serving great beers and keeping people entertained to
say the least. So in the process of talking to the bar keep and ordering my flight of beers, a strange
looking man comes through from the back entrance or employee area and sits down right next to me.
Whiskers that stem from an aged fu Manchu… he has a giant walking stick, a vest, a hat, glasses, and
an assortment of intricacies that were very peculiar.

He places the walking stick behind the bar but not… kind of in an area where it isn’t to bother the bar
keep, Ryan. The Man orders a Coors Light and I double take as I’m sitting there trying out my flight of
beer. I looked at him and said with a humble chuckle, ‘you look like a man of intricate taste; however,
I believe that you’ve met your match, almost certain that they don’t serve coors light here’

to which he replied, ‘I’m sure they do… on the spout next to the taps.’

Mind you, there are two tap line spots there and both are stacked with bear republic beers…
not a sign of coors light

but Ryan proceeds to move forward in grabbing this strange mans giant litre mug and walks to a cooler
scoops a giant scoop of ice into said litre mug. He then proceeds to walk up to the soda gun and pours
water into the mug and it clicked.
AH, Coors light!… I had a homer simpson goes to the gym moment (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PGLzm-Gy0dQ)

Anyway, I got a good laugh out of the transaction and proceeded to talk to this gent.
“I like your coors light…. I usually order mine without ice”
‘That’s called coors’
“HA! That’s awesome! What’s your name?”
‘The name’s Ranger Rick.’
The name tickles my quick response bone and I reply, “Oh nice, I’m Big Rick…. And you know what they
Say, two ricks don’t make a right, they make an awesome.”

we got a good laugh out of that and proceeded to just shoot the shit for a bit.

I believe that Mr. Ranger Rick was actually the owner of the brewery but I will never truly know until
I go back to California though. Anyway, I shot the shit with the owner, the bar keep, and one of the
Locals that actually lives in New York and resides in California during certain parts of the year.

The people from the brewery were awesome and it was kind of cool seeing the brewery being where
It was in comparison to what was in the surrounding areas were….
Think about fancy winter park or just a fancy area in general…. If anyone has been to Baldwin park,
You would know how vanilla the place is… not bland in the sense of architecture, but very stamped out
Buildings that all follow a specific style guide and it’s almost like mickey mouse runs the area cause everything
has to look perfect in the eyes of the beholder.

but at the same time, the area it’s in, is also beautiful.

It’s a double edged sword to be honest with ya but that’s just me and my way of thinking, I guess.

Picture perfect square in a picture perfect town….. (lots of wealthy money passing through)

I’ll get on the return to the brewery here soon enough
just need more time


big rick

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by the way, that video takes a little bit to load for some reason
so don't worry about it if it doesn't play straight away....
it takes a lil bit of buffer time and then you can push play.... 00:00:09 seconds long

big rick

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so i have the rest of the story written up and edited to remove the bullshit
and i also have all of the pictures ready to go but i decided to just give you
the pictures....


i'm saying this because round two is gonna happen and i'm going to take
a journal with me and write down some mind feels, mouth feels, body feels,
eyeball feels, ear feels, and smell feels.

gonna do some drawings while out there too....

sketch out some perspectives of what i'm seeing at the time to then go and
transfer that drawing into an eventual painting.

i'll probably just make a new thread where no one can respond and i just post
updates as they come to me in a twitter like fashion but without all the pound
signs, minimalism typing, abbreviations, and all sorts of other bullshit of twitter

and probably not my typing either

almost certain that my writings are the reason that book burning exists

HashTag i know the truth.... i think.... and it's all false

big rick

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Round two
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